Why Do Couples Look Alike?
Why Do Couples Look Alike?
3 Reasons Partners Begin To Resemble Each Other, Explained
Oh No They Didn't! - LiveJournal
By JR THORPE May 12 2015
It is a truth universally acknowledged that couples which sidestep their individuality and become One Combined Being are the most irritating people at every cocktail party. They refer to themselves in the plural, have matching shirts, and — oddly — even seem to look like each other. Those first two can be stopped, but science has declared that, indeed, the longer you're with a partner (and we're talking seriously long-term here; decades, not months), the more you resemble each other. It's called convergence of appearance, if you want to get technical. But researchers are still undecided as to why couples start to dress and look alike. There are a few competing theories about why your Aunt Wilma and Uncle Wilbur could easily pass for each other in a badly-lit room.
We've heard that we're likely to settle down with people who look quite similar to us — even if we casually date people who look different. Opposites may attract (Kendrick Lamar's never wrong, right?), but that appears to be confined to personality. While we seem to like a bit of difference in a partner's character, when it comes to faces, it's usually all us, all the time.
So what on earth is going on here? Why would people start to morph slowly into their partners? And why are scientists telling us it's actually a good sign?
1. You Look Like Each Other To Begin With
One of the greatest secrets of the dating pool is that people seem to actively attempt to date people similar to them in some way — in education level, height, age, face shape, whatever. It's called assortative mating, and it's used to explain why educated people tend to marry other educated people and double their opportunities. It's not hard to understand why — you like somebody who knows what you're talking about when you moan about your 9-to-5 and college loans — but on a certain level, similarity is also determined in terms of genetics. And that includes faces.
We seem to like genetic similarity. Opposites don't actually attract all that conclusively, if you trust the science. A study from 2014 shows that white people in particular pick lifetime mates who have similar DNA. Forget the obsession with band T-shirts or the inability to play Monopoly without screaming; you may not have worked out with your ex simply because they weren't that genetically compatible with you. We subconsciously want to pass on our own genes, and your chances of having a kid similar to you is bolstered with somebody who looks like you. (Unfortunately, there's been little-to-no research on how this trend plays out in mixed-race couples.)
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